I’m not great at articulating my relationship with Divinity, but when I do, it helps me process my experiences. My encounters with God are deeply personal. I suspect some who stumble upon my musings might want to invalidate my experience because it does not fit with what they think God is like, that makes me feel sad. There may be some, however, who totally get me, and that makes me feel happy.
Some things to know:
I pray. Prayer to me is mystical and amazing; speaking to an indescribable almighty Being – who listens and responds. It is as vital to my existence as breathing. It changes my reality. It is power. Sometimes I forget to pray. I wish I wouldn’t do that.
I meditate. I sit in quiet stillness and allow my soul to be ministered to by the Divine One while I listen. It is impossible to deny the existence of God after experiencing the overwhelming warmth and peace that pours like warm oil over my soul during meditation. It’s not always like that though – but I wish it were.
God Speaks. Learning to listen is a life-long process, but God most assuredly speaks to me, and it is personal, relevant, and life-changing. I think the faith part is the hardest; the part when I must accept, by faith, that the Still Small Voice impressing itself upon me is indeed my Creator. This is when I have to trust a vapor, a nuance, and that requires great discernment. Sometimes I wish discerning the voice of the Almighty was easier – but then it probably wouldn’t be worth it.
I read; the Bible and many other books not quite as important as the Bible. This is one of the ways God speaks. It is by reading scripture that I discern the source of the Gentle Whisper. The Bible is wacky sometimes. There are days when I am dumbfounded by what I read . I laugh and say, “funny how no one has ever preached a sermon on that!” because if someone did – they’d have to be crazy. Other days, I am astonished by the laser-like quality with which the words of this great book penetrate my heart.
There are words in the Bible that describe God as looking like fire and rainbows:
Above this surface was something that looked like a throne made of blue lapis lazuli. And on this throne high above was a figure whose appearance resembled a person. From what appeared to be the waist up, it looked like gleaming amber, flickering like a fire. And from waist down, like a burning flame, shining with splendor. All around was a glowing halo, like a rainbow shining in the clouds on a rainy day. This is what the glory of the Lord looked like to me. When I saw it, I fell face down on the ground, and I heard someone’s voice speaking to me. Ezekiel 1:26-28
This is my current favorite description of God. It fits very well with my personal experience of Divinity. This is not a God to just drop in on for a casual visit. This is an awe-inspiring, humbling, life-giving, life-changing, uncontainable, magnificent Being. This is the God I seek to know every day. Sometimes I am successful; sometimes it feels like I have lost all connection with my Source of life. That’s part of the faith journey.
I pray the journey is filled with more victories than defeats, more wisdom than foolishness, more love than indifference, and more grace than judgment; and after that, even more grace.
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